Cologne. On October 4th, 2017, writer Susi L. found herself bored and in the safety of her own home. While scrolling through Pinterest, she came across a post that would change her life. Based on former searches and interests, Pinterst suggested the ‘Cookie Dough Craving Fix For 1’. Upon clicking on said post, Susi discovered that she had all the ingredients but one in her home. She prepared the mix without the missing ingredient, placed the almost-ready mix in one of the cupboards so that her boyfriend would not find it once returning home from work and pretended like nothing had happened.
While Susi L. was about to walk to the grocery store in order to purchase said missing ingredient, her boyfriend asked her to drive him and their mutual friend to the movie theathre she agreed to do so. Once the men had left the car, she proceeded to drive to the next store with parking spots available. Sources say that Susi L. was seen wearing black sweatpants when she entered a local Aldi store in Cologne. An eye-witness told us that she had purchased unsuspicious basic items such as bottled water, fruit and vegetables, oats, hummus and butter. Apart from wearing sweatpants and a track suit jacket, nothing seemed suspicious. The cashier told us that she even paid cash which she took out of an envelope that said ‘October 2017’. Her behaviour was described as that of a normal customer during later store hours. Another eye witness said that she had dark circles under her eyes and that she was very pale.
As she proceeded to load the purchases into the car, another car drove up to her and asked her about store hours and whether or not they had to pay for parking. After having parked the car, the driver approached L. one last time to ask if she herself had paid for the parking. L. declined, the man proceded and L. returned her shopping cart. The driver told us: ‘She seemed very tired and based on what I saw in her trunk, she really needs to clean out her car. There were clothes all over the trunk.’
In the car, Susi L. placed the butter on the passenger seat and turned on the seat warmer in order to soften the butter. As soon as she stepped into the kitchen she droped to bag of groceries and got out the almost-ready mix. She scooped up two tablespoons of the now-soft butter and added it to the mix. The regular spoon wouldn’t work so she had to rely on a technical device in order to create the perfect cookie dough.
L. ate the whole thing in two sessions. Upon the first bite, L. found the dough way too sweet but proceeded anyways. After watching her new-found favourite series ‘Catastrophe’, she decided to put one half of the dough into the freezer. Two episodes later, L. retrieved the second half to eat it in a second session.
As her boyfriend returned from home, she had already removed all evidence. To this day, L.’s boyfriend has no knowledge of the incident as he declined any comment. L. herself agreed to give us an exclusive statement:
Susi L.: ‘I am very ashamed of my actions. At the moment they might only hurt my teeth and my overall body fat percentage, but in the long run they might hurt my friends and family. There is no excuse for this behaviour. It’s time for me to clean up my act and change my lifestyle. Eating what was supposed to be a cookie dough fix for one person but turned out to be more than just one portion was simply wrong and I have to accept the fact that it wasn’t even that delicious and yet, I chose to eat the entire thing. It didn’t even satisfy me! I am disgusted by myself and in that night, I realized that I had hit rock bottom. Now it’s time for me to climb back up and climbing is always easier when you’re skinny so that is where 30andskinny comes into the picture. I promise to stick with Paul McKenna’s method and by the time I turn 30, I will be back at my original weight and back at the top.’